Que Sera Sera

We come to potential crossroads in our life.

Maybe I’ve been thinking of something for quite awhile without realizing it. I’m heading to a milestone, age 50, and I’m a little contemplative on the kind of Crone I am going to be. I am not going into my senior years quietly and sedate. My mother mired herself down in age and appearance until she disappeared and became a caricature of a miserable little old lady. I don’t intend to live a second of my life miserably.

What is the difference between a milestone and a crossroads? To me, milestones cannot be avoided and crossroads are conscious choices.

There are many milestone birthdays. 30 is a big one, and when I turned 30 I had a 21 years old boyfriend who eventually became X2.

(One reason for the happy faces in the pictures in the previous blog entry “50 is the new 30”, be sure to read it, tell your friends and neighbors.)

I turned 13 living in a fairytale world of living with two loving parents, a little brother and 2 baby sisters, going to a private school with tiny classes and teachers who cared. In a picturesque house, on a quiet little street, in a little southern town. Substitute Aunt and Uncle for Mom and Dad and cousins for brothers and sisters and you have the Brady Bunch year of my life. It was the last traditional family relationship I was to be part of and I was just a bit player, playing the part of Cissy in Family Affair for one normal year, the year I turned 13.

18 finds me a career girl in Lafayette La. Fresh out of high school, in my first job. 21 finds me the same way, an answering service operator that lives with her mom, only name of the workplace have been changed.

25, I’m a young mother and wife in Lafayette. And 30, I’ve already bragged about. 40 wasn’t all that great as I was dealing with many issues involving a newly ex hubby and visitations of my precious little girl with a (there is no way to describe) soon to be step-monster.

I can’t say how I’ll spend 50. Life is so volatile that in the five months I have left of age 49 could drastically change, abrupt change always seems to happen when you feel the most secure, and that’s why you have to maintain an “edge”. Listen to your Auntie Vi, folks. Auntie knows, Auntie understands.

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